Parents - Support for Parents

LEA Guidance

What Are The Signs Of Bullying?

Children or young people may:-

be frightened of the journey to school
refuse to attend school
arrive home very hungry
come home with possessions destroyed
ask for extra money
have unexplained cuts and bruises
have difficulty coping with schoolwork
have nightmares and cry in their sleep
seem unhappy but refuse to say what is wrong

More Information on the Behaviour of Targets

What Can Parents Do?

If your child is bullied:-

listen calmly to your child and take what he/ she says seriously
reassure your child that it is not his/ her fault
make a note of what happened, when and who was involved
tell your child that you will find ways to ensure his/ her safety
make an appointment to see your child's teacher
find out what action the teacher plans to take and when
keep in touch with school
let school staff know if things improve or if there are further incidents
do not confront the child or parents yourself � work together with school staff

If You Are Not Satisfied With The Response From the School

make an appointment to see the Headteacher

explain why you want the appointment so he/ she can investigate before the meeting
after the meeting, give the Headteacher time to deal with the situation
if you are still not satisfied with the response, make a formal written complaint to the Chair of Governors
in your letter of complaint � explain what has happened and tell the Chair what you would feel to be a satisfactory outcome
remember that the most important thing is your child's well-being and safety � not revenge

Do Schools Have a Responsibility To Maintain Standards of Behaviour and Discipline?

Yes. Registered inspectors report on behaviour and discipline as part of the OFSTED Framework for Inspection. They consider whether pupils are free from bullying, racism and other forms of harassment. This takes into account views of parents as well as students. (OFSTED, Handbook for Inspecting Nursery, Primary and Secondary Schools, effective from September 2003)

Schools Should:

have a clear behaviour policy and publicise it annually
promote respect for others
make it clear that it does not tolerate bullying and harassment

(Annex B, The Legal Framework for School Discipline, September 1999)

Remember Schools can only help if they know what is happening

Headteachers Are Responsible For:

maintaining acceptable standards of discipline and behaviour in schools
regulating pupil's conduct
putting in place effective strategies to combat bullying
acting in accordance with policies written by the Governing Body

(Annex B, The Legal Framework for School Discipline, September 1999)
They should 'encourage good behaviour and respect for others on the part of the pupils and, in particular, prevent all forms of bullying among pupils.' (Section 61 (4) b School Standards and framework Act, 1998)

Governors Are Responsible For:

formulating a whole school discipline policy
the ethos of the school and its values
producing an effective complaints procedure
making sure that the National Curriculum is delivered; this includes Personal, Social and Health Education

Help To Prevent Bullying

talk to your children about how they treat others who are younger or less able or different from themselves
encourage your children to think about how others feel
ask them if there are children who are picked on at school
tell them that they can help to stop bullying by befriending and supporting children who are less able to cope with teasing
bullying behaviour can happen at any age � check your own actions
lead by example � think before you tease those who perhaps are not as strong as you

Together we can create a calmer, happier environment

Parent Guidance - A4 (MS Word, 609K)

Kidscape Guidance

The NSPCC's 10 Top Tips for Parents

Make time to talk to your child on a regular basis about things in general, so if there is a problem it may be easier to share.
Look out for any changes. Listen to your child and believe what they tell you - this way it may be easier to know when there is a problem.
Encourage your child to feel good about themselves, but also to understand that we are all different and all equally important.
Think back to your own childhood - how did you feel?
Get to know your child's school and the policy. Be realistic in your expectations of the school if they have agreed to sort things out - if it is an ongoing problem it may take some time to resolve it properly.
Try to be assertive with the school but not aggressive; without a good working relationship between parentsand schools the situation could deteriorate, which won't help your child at all.
If you believe your child is being bullied or is a bully, talk to other adults at home or school, and explore all the options. Don't suufer in silence. parents can feel terribly isolated when faced with the problems of bullying.
If your child is a victim, assure them that it's not their fault, and that you are going to do something to help. Always remember that they can't solve this alone. reassure them - they're not on their own anymore.
Involve them in the solution to the problem - what do they want to happen?
If your child needs to talk to someone in confidence, tell them about the NSPCC Helpline - freephone 0808 800 500.